By Chief Sam DiGiovanna
There is no doubt we live in challenging times. Long periods which continue with the pandemic and coronavirus, civil unrest, political divisions, war, gas prices surging, water shortages, inflation – certainly no shortages of concerns.
Did people have feelings of unhappiness before the above mentioned in our world? The answer is yes, they did. Most people are unhappy with some aspects of their lives regardless. Mental health struggles were present long before and will continue. Why are there so many struggles to be happy?
The only one that has the ability to keep your fuse lit, is you! If you fail to keep it ignited, anxiety, stress, and feelings of sadness will grow like an uncontrolled fire.
Human behavior and happiness have always fascinated me. When it comes to happiness and emotional health, there are three important criteria for success:
- Emotional wellbeing must be periodically kept in check and updated.
- Happiness must be consistent with your practice personally and professionally.
- It must be reinforced through training. Yes, training your mind!
Review and update
Just as we need to periodically review our department policies, we need to periodically take stock of our personal happiness. Most people worry about their own plans, promotions and agendas, and don’t look out for the interests of others. They don’t get up in the morning and give their first thought to how someone else is doing, because they’re concerned with their own problems.
If this describes you, it may be time for an update. The starting point for all happiness is shifting the focus away from yourself. I have seen too many people tune into the WIIFM (What’s In It For Me) station 24/7 on the personal dial all the time!
If all you think about is yourself, you’re going to be a pretty miserable person. If you truly want to be happy in life, you have to care about the needs of those around you. Yes, everyone! Your fellow firefighters, the community you serve and even the administration.
Make it consistent with your practice
Your attitude about happiness is meaningless if you don’t back it up with action. Think about it from a fire service perspective: Your policy says to wear SCBA at fires until atmospheric monitoring gives the all-clear to remove it. But if your firefighters routinely perform overhaul without being on air, your policy is inconsistent with your practice — and that means your policy is ineffective.
So, you can tell yourself — and others — that you’re a happy, positive person. But is that consistent with your actions? Of course, we can’t all be “bubbly” extroverts who always see the glass half-full. But we can establish a “policy” of trying to remain positive and of seeing good in others.
Reinforce through training
If you want to be one of those rare, unselfish people, you’ve got to shift your focus away from yourself to other people. That’s not something that comes naturally, so it’s something you have to learn to do.
I’ve always liked this quote from Philippians 2:4: “Don’t be obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand.” Instead of griping about missed opportunities, promotions or events, be intentional about stepping outside yourself and into the needs of others, where you’ll find happiness in serving others.
That may seem odd — training to be happy? — but it’s really no different than any other policy. If it sits on a shelf gathering dust, it isn’t doing you any good. If you train on it regularly, however, it becomes an innate part of who you are and how you act and react to situations.
Time for change?
When we become firefighters, we take an oath to serve others. That’s a big responsibility, but fortunately for us, it’s also what makes the job so great. If you’ve lost touch with that perspective, it may be time for an attitude and behavior adjustment.
Each mental health condition has its own signs and symptoms. In general, however, professional help might be needed if you experience:
- Marked changes in personality, eating or sleeping patterns
- An inability to cope with problems or daily activities
- Feeling of disconnection or withdrawal from normal activities
- Unusual or “magical” thinking
- Excessive anxiety
- Prolonged sadness, depression or apathy
- Thoughts or statements about suicide or harming others
- Substance misuse
- Extreme mood swings
- Excessive anger, hostility or violent behavior
Many people who have mental health disorders consider their signs and symptoms a normal part of life or avoid treatment out of shame or fear. If you’re concerned about your mental health, don’t hesitate to seek advice from a licensed qualified therapist.
Chief Sam DiGiovanna is a 35-year fire service veteran. He started with the Los Angeles County Fire Department, served as Fire Chief at the Monrovia Fire Department, and currently serves as Chief at the Verdugo Fire Academy in Glendale. Passionate about public safety and risk management, he also is a consultant for Cordico www.Cordico.com, Lexipol www.Lexipol.com & Fortress North America Fortress